Chronologically structured using GIFs to quickly recognise these locations for faster/smoother replays, not for first playthroughs!
Dream Eater’s Palace (Intro)
Artifacts
1
When entering the library, you’ll see the Angel of Hope on a sidetable inbetween the 2 bookcases.
Underground Station
Artifacts
3
Shadowy Creature
Mouldy Sandwich
Chef Armando
Jar of Pickled Cucumber
Critters
6
Enter the Snack Shack on the left from behind for your first critter.
Go through the gates, go to the left corner for the second critter.
In a breakable box next to a body, you’ll find the Statue of Mercy.
Don’t forget the Mouldy Sandwich after target practice for the Shadowy Creature who’s residing in the restroom.
Go to the Screwdriver room (top left) where you’ll find the Jar of Pickled Cucumber for Chef Armando…
and the third critter.
To the other side (top right) of the hallway, behind 2 rats and in the hands of a body, you’ll find an Ancient Halo.
The fourth critter is all the way down the hall (bottom right).
The Warrior of Change is waiting for you to start the train sequence.
Your fifth critter will be hiding behind a stack of safes/luggages.
After Jenny, the sixth and final critter will be on your left behind the metal crate.
Aquarium
GIF for the Plumped Lipstick and Comb are missing
Artifacts
3
Shadowy Creature
Frostbitten Fish
Chef Armando
Hot Sauce
Critters
7
Critters in this level are textured blue.
To the back in the right corner, you’ll find the first critter.
After killing the humanoid enemy, don’t forget to get the Frostbitten Fish for the Shadowy Creature who’s barricaded in the woman’s restroom.
Go left in the backrooms, you’ll find the Hot Sauce for Chef Armando.
In the room behind the Water Filter, break the 2 crates on your right for the second and third critter.
After you’ve completed your first water generator puzzle, go back to the room where you got the Water Sample from. Go up the ladder and then down the latter of the smaller water basin.
This where you’ll find the first artifact, the Plumped Lipstick.
(Placeholder GIF)
This where you’ll find the first artifact, the Plumped Lipstick.
(Placeholder GIF)At the top of the first stairwell, you’ll find the fourth critter.
The Manipulator’s Mirror can be found in a corner after breaking the second generator whilst fighting the Massive Eyesore.
In the maze, you’ll find the fifth critter in a small section to the left hidden behind a corner…
and the sixth critter in a small section to the right near the bottom.
At the bottom of the second stairwell, you’ll find the Comb amongst a lot of enemies.
The seventh and final critter is found at the bottom of the second water generator puzzle.
Crypt
GIF for sixth critter’s missing
Artifacts
3
Shadowy Creature
Mummified Cat
Chef Armando
Ancient Yeast
Critters
7
You’ll immediately find the first critter when entering.
The Agoniser’s Scepter is found in a barricaded section of the first room to the left.
The second critter is in the same room infront of the door.
The third critter is hidden in a pot.
It’s part of the larger group of pots, the one on right in first person.
It’s part of the larger group of pots, the one on right in first person.
To the right of the Square door, the third critter will be chilling on a chest.
Go through the Downturned Triangle door to find the Agoniser’s Gauntlet.
After Gabriella’s Dad, when entering the first room down the stairs you’ll find the fourth critter on your left.
In the top left corner of the same room, a barricaded door will lead you to Chef Armando’s final ingredient: the Ancient Yeast.
The third room down the stairs will have the Mummified Cat, happy backtracking to the Shadowy Creature in the Circle room!
Towards the end of the second sarcophagus level, go left (watch out for the big pointy enemy) for the Agoniser’s Crown.
During you final escort mission with the Dog Statue, the sixth critter will be chilling towards the end, to the right of the section. You don’t need to walk over the spikes.
You’ll see the seventh and final critter behind a few pots infront of the Massive Eyesore.
Duchess’s Bedroom (Gabriella’s Key)
Artifacts
3
All the artifacts are displayed next to each other, they are:
the Archdemon’s Anguish, the Archdemon’s Agony and the Archdemon’s Ache.
Dream Eater’s Palace (Day 3)
Critters
2
Both of them are found whilst running through the corridors.
The first one’s in the first corridor. You will be chased by Dream Eater.
When running right, after weaving through bookcases, look for a sidetable with a candelabra.
It’ll be right behind it.
When running right, after weaving through bookcases, look for a sidetable with a candelabra.
It’ll be right behind it.
The second one’s in the second corridor. Dream Eater won’t chase you yet.
Go all the way up after turning the first corner, it’ll sit infront of the refills.
Go all the way up after turning the first corner, it’ll sit infront of the refills.
The Hotel
GIF’s missing for final artifact & critter
Artifacts
3
Critters
4
Enter the Massive Eyesore’s room to find the Archangel’s Chastity.
Your first bug’s having a comfy seat on the right.
The second and third bug are having a shower together towards the bottom of the shower maze.
One of the four Michelle’s who’re showering will be standing ontop of the Archangel’s Modesty.
The game’s final artifact is the Archangel’s X.
Make sure you kill the Exploding Michelle on the opposite side before walking Mirror Michelle back to the Circle pressure pad.
Make sure you kill the Exploding Michelle on the opposite side before walking Mirror Michelle back to the Circle pressure pad.
Last but not least, the final critter can be found in the second(?) cubicle on the left side of the last elevator’s sequence.
Conclusion
6-star runs do not require the Duchess’s artifacts.
I’ll upload the remaining GIFs & update/use the right item names for the incomplete locations after I’ve ran through the game again to record these sections!
I’ll upload the remaining GIFs & update/use the right item names for the incomplete locations after I’ve ran through the game again to record these sections!
And that wraps up our share on Sorry We’re Closed: All Artifact, Food and Critter Locations. If you have any additional insights or tips to contribute, don’t hesitate to drop a comment below. For a more in-depth read, you can refer to the original article here by cybermaiden, who deserves all the credit. Happy gaming!